multiple choice

In every city we perform in, our cellist Deborah is known for having an admirer, code-named “Matt”. In which of the following cities does she NOT have a “Matt”?

a) Chicago

b) Houston

c) Taipei

d) Vancouver

Which of these is NOT a dog in the Formosa Quartet family?

a) a Beagle and German Shepherd mix named Baci

b) a Jack Russell Terrier and Dachsund mix named Ashkii

c) a Siberian Husky named Zephyr

d) a Black Lab named Duckwater Shoshone

Which past situation does Cheyen like to remind Wayne of, every chance he gets?

a) When Cheyen accidentally walked into Wayne’s fitting room at Old Navy, Wayne was wearing lobster underwear.

b) While driving to a rehearsal, Cheyen had to pull over so Wayne could pee by the New Jersey Turnpike.

c) Cheyen defended Wayne at Giverny Festival when Wayne got in trouble for writing “tritones suck” on the bathroom wall.

d) Cheyen was Wayne’s chamber music coach at Juilliard.

What distracted Wayne during a Mendelssohn Octet rehearsal?

a) He received a text from Debbie, asking him to play softer.

b) One player’s legs were spread open to a near-180° angle, giving Wayne a stellar view of the crotch area.

c) Jasmine reeked of the garlic she’d eaten for lunch.

d) A bird landed on the windowsill and gobbled up a cricket he had noticed at the start of rehearsal.

Which of these conversations does Formosa Quartet have on nearly every trip?


— I think we should play the Carter cycle.

— Let’s do whatever it takes to become world-famous.

— OK, Carter cycle and boob jobs.

— And go onstage naked.


— Let’s go get Thai massages.

— Is that where they rub their breasts all over you?

— No, that’s a Thai bath.


— Your feet support you, and I support your feet. Therefore I support you.

— If you support my feet, does that mean you support my sole?

— I assumed your sole was in tow.


— Thank you!

— No, thank you!

— How many subsets are we at?